i have decided to apply for Teach For America. this should be an interesting process and as i am quickly realizing, i probably don't know what i am getting myself into.
i am an all or nothing kind of girl. if i am going to do something, i do it - jump in head first without looking back. and if i am not going to do something, i avoid it like the plague. i hate that in between zone, the over analyzing that leads to well hesitating on the edge forever. that said i tend to go for things without really knowing much about them, and go for them whole-heartedly. i never turn in rough drafts for papers, in fact i won't turn the assignment in at all unless i feel like its complete and as good as i could do. i can't eat just one cheetoh, i have to eat the whole bag. i either exercise every day for a month, or not a single day. if i do something its because i believe in it with all of my heart, and if i don't do something its because i believe in that will all of my heart. i don't do really anything without being sure in my heart. but hey - at least i put my whole self into the things i do.
i tend to think that i know what i am doing. that might be to a fault, but it seems to have worked for me so far. i trust myself. i am an intuitioner to the T. or should i say to the I.
that said, Teach For America is a highly selective and competitive organization. maybe 10% of all applicants will be accepted. and they have more than enough qualified applicants. that little fact makes me question whether or not head-first jumping is really the best way to go about this.
i'm thinking i need to do more than just be myself (aka wing it). part of me feels i should study up on how to create a lesson plan, the severity and pervasiveness of the education gap, maybe even have my letter of intent edited.... but another part of me feels that would be selling out and not being true to who i am. i have never been one to suck up, sell out or compete. i like being me, genuinely. if you like it - great. if not, well then we would have been a bad fit anyway. no sense in working hard to be something i am not.
i feel that if i am going do all that research and work and learning, i would really want to be sure this is a good fit for me, what i want. and i am not really sure of that. so instead of deciding that for myself i will leave the decision to the experts. i will give them who i am and if who i am is who they want. great. if not? well then maybe i will become a white water rafting instructor after all.
so its decided. ill go with being me and jumping headfirst into this thing. maybe not entirely blindly, but still as zealously as ever.
i am an all or nothing kind of girl. if i am going to do something, i do it - jump in head first without looking back. and if i am not going to do something, i avoid it like the plague. i hate that in between zone, the over analyzing that leads to well hesitating on the edge forever. that said i tend to go for things without really knowing much about them, and go for them whole-heartedly. i never turn in rough drafts for papers, in fact i won't turn the assignment in at all unless i feel like its complete and as good as i could do. i can't eat just one cheetoh, i have to eat the whole bag. i either exercise every day for a month, or not a single day. if i do something its because i believe in it with all of my heart, and if i don't do something its because i believe in that will all of my heart. i don't do really anything without being sure in my heart. but hey - at least i put my whole self into the things i do.
i tend to think that i know what i am doing. that might be to a fault, but it seems to have worked for me so far. i trust myself. i am an intuitioner to the T. or should i say to the I.
that said, Teach For America is a highly selective and competitive organization. maybe 10% of all applicants will be accepted. and they have more than enough qualified applicants. that little fact makes me question whether or not head-first jumping is really the best way to go about this.
i'm thinking i need to do more than just be myself (aka wing it). part of me feels i should study up on how to create a lesson plan, the severity and pervasiveness of the education gap, maybe even have my letter of intent edited.... but another part of me feels that would be selling out and not being true to who i am. i have never been one to suck up, sell out or compete. i like being me, genuinely. if you like it - great. if not, well then we would have been a bad fit anyway. no sense in working hard to be something i am not.
i feel that if i am going do all that research and work and learning, i would really want to be sure this is a good fit for me, what i want. and i am not really sure of that. so instead of deciding that for myself i will leave the decision to the experts. i will give them who i am and if who i am is who they want. great. if not? well then maybe i will become a white water rafting instructor after all.
so its decided. ill go with being me and jumping headfirst into this thing. maybe not entirely blindly, but still as zealously as ever.
